Joy, sorrow; love, hatred; destruction, renewal; 
vital health, painful illness; dismay and delight-- 
in their affirmation, recognition, 
lies the route, the channel to Gratitude. 
Rather than sweet and sugary 
gratitude ruthlessly erodes 
the sense of significant self. 
The more pervasive our thankfulness 
the less necessary we are to ourselves. 

The starting point is so close 
it's hardly seen or felt, 
so fast, it's already gone   
when thought about. 
Let Gratitude surround each move, 
gesture, thought, smell, taste and touch-- 
each--a wonder of being, 
each easily overlooked 
as we go about 
busily maintaining our selves 
all day long. 

So, without "should" but with awareness, 
let us return again and again 
to this moment, this place 
most gratefully 

by Gerow Reece

Suffering is not our natural state, but it is our experience.  Suffering is primarily generated by allowing our sense of ego, our separate self, to dominate our experience.  Our ego actively engages in grasping and resisting, protecting itself from what it deems unpleasant and attaching to the pleasant.  When we see clearly, we realize that the ego is a fabrication, a mirage, a magic trick, but when our eyes are clouded, we believe it to be real.

Great teachers have recognized that we must free ourselves from the ego to be fully liberated from suffering.  For example, “Truly, truly, I say to you, unless a grain of wheat falls into the earth and dies, it remains alone; but if it dies, it bears much fruit".  John 12:24  Gratitude is one way of directing our “wheat” to fall into the earth so that we might live more abundantly.

As Gerow Reece says in his poem, “gratitude ruthlessly erodes the sense of significant self”— our ego. The more gratitude in our lives, “the less necessary we are to ourselves” – gratitude weakens the grip of the ego on our experience.   “As we go about busily maintaining our selves (ego) all day long,” we overlook the joy of being in the present moment.   

Research has linked a grateful mindset and regular gratitude practices to psychological (increased happiness, optimism, enhanced self-esteem, and resilience), physical (improved sleep quality, lower inflammation) and social (prosocial behavior, less envy and materialism) benefits.  It is said that gratitude is mindfulness’ close cousin!

David Steindl-Rast has devoted his life to teaching gratitude as a path to joy and the end of suffering: “It is not happiness that makes us grateful.  It is gratefulness that makes us happy.”  His three steps to gratitude, stop, look, and go, encourage grounding in the present moment, appreciating the opportunities each moment holds, and responding appropriately to the opportunity:

Stop: pause whether the moment is joyful or challenging, breaking the cycle of distraction, grounding in the present moment.

Look: pay attention to your inner and outer surroundings, looking for the gift made available to us in each moment – the gift is the opportunity to learn, grow, or appreciate. Each present moment has its unique gift, an opportunity to expand our understanding and deepen our experience.

Go:  respond to the opportunity that is in each moment – act when appropriate or just fully realize the experience in your mind and body, just as it is, being grateful for whatever opportunity comes your way.

Gratitude is not about being grateful for everything (such as pain, injustice, or violence) but rather being grateful in every moment for the opportunity the moment presents. “Joy, sorrow; love, hatred; destruction, renewal; vital health, painful illness; dismay and delight-- in their affirmation, recognition, lies the route, the channel to Gratitude.”